Letter on Gay Marriage

Dear Frances,

Good article. I agree with the pope that gay marriage causes irreparable damage to society and injures the very fabric of society. I disagree with the pope that this is a bad thing. Patriarchal (Christian) social values need to be damaged — if not completely overturned. Patriarchal Christian values are founded on the patriarachal family with god the father on top, mom next and the kids underneath. The patriarchal family begins the programming process that makes us believe that it is natural for men to be in charge and women to be under them. It is the foundation of a hierarchical social structure which concentrates power in a CEO, President, General, etc., overvalues them and devalues everyone underneath.

Gay marriage provides a totally different model for society — a model of a partnership of equals where there is no hierarchy. It is radically different and provides a radically refreshing model — and so it is very threatening to all those who want to maintain the status quo. So who should be surprised that the pope — the voice of Christian conservatism — should have been against it. But it is the model for the future — and the genie is out of the bottle and it will — eventually — prevail.

I know you don’t agree with me, but I think the pope is very helpful because he is so clear about what Christianity is — which has made it easy for me to reject Christianity. In fact, it was the pope’s explanation of why women could never be priests in a true Christian context which gave me the final push over the edge and out of Christianity.

For me, leaving Christianity has been so liberating. I no longer have to be outraged over things right wing Christians say, arguing that that is not what true Christianity is all about. Clearly, it is what Christianity is about — which is why the right wing resonates so deeply in our culture — and which is why I am no longer a Christian.

Not believing in the Christian God, the God of power over and transcendence and maleness and dominance, etc. does not translate into belief in nothing. I have a deep belief in the Life Force which is manifested in the beauty and variety of nature — which includes everything — even you and me. I am a feminist, an environmentalist, and a pacifist — all attitudes which are at odds with Chtristian teaching.

Frances, I got so tired of arguing that true Christianity was woman- and nature-friendly and opposed to war, when, in fact, tradition and teaching argue the contrary, that I gave up and quit and am pursuing my own beliefs and values.

I know you are still fighting the good fight, but, you know, you don’t have to be a Christian to be a good person or to care deeply about the world and everyone in it — or to see the sacred in all life around you or to feel the power of the life force moving through you and connecting you to all things with a bond deeper than the deep.

Love, Eleanor

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.